As I sit and watched the new video Beyoncé dropped yesterday, Formation, my mind was blown. I had to pause and get my whole life!!

Though I am more of a Jay-Z fan than a Bey fan (since hip hop has always been my first love), but Beyoncé certainly snapped with this video.

She did several things in it that every woman, especially women of color, black women in particular can learn from….

Biggest Lesson: How to Be Unbothered and Unapologetic About Who You Are

I find myself talking about this more and more lately because I am at this place in my own life, and the power in it is so empowering and liberating that I can’t keep it to myself.

In the video, she takes everything that others have thrown her way about how she looks, who she is as a black woman, how her child’s hair looks, and what others believe she follows (ie. the “illuminati”).

My favorite lines from the song:
“I twirl on them haters.”
“Always stay gracious, best revenge is your paper”

“I might be a black Bill Gates in the making”
I like my baby hair with baby hair and afros
I like my negro nose with Jackson 5 nostrils
“Stop shooting us” (this is painted on a wall…a la “black lives matter”)

Basically, Beyoncé’ doesn’t give two f**** what others say because she SLAYS regardless of what others say.

She is happy regardless of what others think is wrong with her body, how she does her child’s hair, or how she defines herself.


By fully accepting herself and showing it loudly and proudly…she also calls out to you and to me, to get into “FORMATION” with her, and be UNAPOLOGETIC about who we are and what we stand for.

As we know, if you don’t stand for something…you will fall for anything.

So I urge you to pull out a journal or sheet of paper, and DEFINE yourself for yourself:

  • What have others said that bothered you? Why is it bothering you? How can you respond different the next time it comes up?
  • What parts of your body are you self-conscious about? What parts are not traditionally accepted by society? Why will you now embrace it to the fullest?
  • How have you allowed other people in the past to define you? Why will you no longer be allowing that to happen?
  • What do you fiercely believe in…in regards to society? In terms of making the world a better place? How can you be more visible and present with this in your life?
  • Who are your haters, critics, naysayers, doubt-pushers, and fear phantoms? Why will you no longer be tolerating what they have to say about you or what you have to say about yourself?

As Beyonce’ has shown, that DEFINING yourself is always YOUR responsibility.

This comes with GROWTH and your EVOLUTION as a woman. 5 years ago Bey would have never dropped something like this in a video, but she has used her wisdom from her own personal experience to teach us that:

People can talk. Society can judge. Haters can doubt.  But, one thing remains true…
You FORM the beliefs about yourself and then expect all others to follow them.

If they can’t get in LINE, then they will no longer be a part of your formation (your life!) because you are way to worthy, deserving, and fierce to let it keep you down.

Watch and Learn:

Next Step: 

Share via social media and comment below:

  • What did you think of the video?
  • What was your favorite line?
  • How did the questions I pose above help you?

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